
The snack food that litters your back seat may come
from the Quickie Mart, but you'll search in vain to find titanic Twinkies or
behemoth Beef Jerky on the US vacation horizon. Instead, Americans honor the
food groups that made us strong before we said the-hell-with-that and got satellite
TV -- fruits
and vegetables -- honest-to-goodness snacks from scientifically standardized
factory farms, nurtured by fertilizer from the most advanced chemical industry
on earth.
These mighty munchables are a link to our past, but they also offer a glimpse
of a glorious future, when biotechnology will give us asparagus as tall as
a CD tower and prunes as big as your couch.
Big Apple of Cornelia, Georgia. |
Apple
Apollo, son of Zeus, god of beauty and poetry, might use these
giant apples to keep away giant doctors or to bonk spoilsport William
Shatner on the head.
(Big Apple # 1 - Cornelia,
GA: The apple stands at the railroad depot "at the geometric center" of
town. Big
Apple # 2 - Winchester, VA: From 81 south, Hwy. 11 exit.
Right off the square in town center.)
For some vengeful apples, see The
Tree Root That Ate Roger Williams |
Big Apple of Winchester, Virginia. |
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Artichoke
Artemis, Greek goddess of the moon, would have a new neighbor if
this mighty artichoke were ever orbited. [Awesome
Artichoke] |
Carrot & Lettuce Rabbitus, devourer of gardens, guards these salad ingredients in Cherokee, NC.
Santa's Land Theme Park:Address: Soco Road, Cherokee, NC [ Show Map] Directions: Se of Cherokee, US Hwy 19. Hours: Opens in May. (Call to verify) Phone: 828-497-9191
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Corn
Khepera, Egyptian god of morning, needs skyscraper-sized prairie gold to
make corn flakes for early rising immortals. [Considerable
Corn] |
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Egg
We bet that Isis, Egyptian goddess of fertility,
had something to do with these giant eggs. [Enormous
Eggs] |
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Orange Osiris and one of his oranges, left by
the Egyptian god of the underworld in Florida, our own version of down
under. [Ominous Oranges] |
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Peach
Pomona, Roman goddess of fruits, offers three fuzzy peaches [Clanton,
AL, Byron, GA, and Gaffney, SC], |
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Peanut
Nut, the Egyptian goddess of the heavens, has many shrines scattered
across the South. But the mightiest
wears her crown along the interstate in Ashburn, GA. |
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Pecan
Persephone is the Greek queen of infernal regions, the only places with
a climate suitable for pecan growth. Except, perhaps, for Missouri or
Texas.
[Pecan 1 vs. Pecan 2] |
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Potato
Phineus was a Greek who tried to slay the son of Zeus and was turned
into stone by Medusa's head. As, apparently, were giant potatoes in Blackfoot and Driggs,
ID. |
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Strawberry
Saturn, Roman god of harvests, likes his strawberries big. [Stupendous
Strawberries] |
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Watermelon
Wotan, Teutonic boss god, left this half-eaten watermelon behind
in Green River, UT, when he moved to pricier digs in Valhalla. [Weighty
Watermelons] |
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Finally, the Jolly
Green Giant of Blue Earth, MN, America's own agricultural god,
protects all fruits and vegetables who drive around looking at giant
fruits and vegetables. |
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