Elephants.

Pet Cemetery: Elephant Burial Ground

In the world of cartoon fantasy, trained elephants dance in tutus, run screaming from little mice, and cavort holding martini glasses with their trunks.

In real life, trained elephants are hit by lightning and trains, and have careers usually limited to balancing on little platforms and pulling Shriners around in haywagons.

Pissed-off pachyderms sometimes make mad dashes for freedom, usually from whatever circus roustabout forgot to hammer down the leg chain. People who cross them have their bodies turned into pile drivers or their heads into unrecognizable mush.

Time and again, homicidal Jumbos and Jingos are executed by creatures with arguably less intelligence, but certainly more firepower. And since you bury an elephant where it falls, monuments to these creatures are scattered across the country.

We dedicate this list to America's dead, misunderstood titans, and honor them with the words that could be emblazoned on every elephant's grave:

Never Forget!

Electrocuted by EdisonElectrocuted by Edison Mythical Elephant Train WreckElephant Train Wreck

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