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Liquid Fate Reveals The Peril Of Chilled Attractions

September 29, 2008

Life-size sculptures made of butter have become status symbols during State Fair season. They’ve grown increasingly sophisticated since the days when only one or two Midwestern states would hire someone to carve a half-ton cow. Now states ranging from Massachusetts to Texas vie to display the most elaborate dairy-derived art, whose subjects can range from a crashed car to Marilyn Monroe.

And a new twist has emerged. The State University of New York College of Environmental Science and Forestry has informed the public that it took this year’s New York State Fair butter sculpture — an impressive cow jumping over a moon — and melted it into 96 gallons of biodiesel. It would seem that the only thing that this attraction was ultimately good for was mini-bus fuel.

The existence of these eager-beaver student recyclers has made us rethink the fates of other refrigerated wonders, whose ends still remain a mystery. Was the World’s Largest Wheel of Cheese crumbled into road salt by some nearby junior college? Was Sonja Henie’s Ice Heart chopped into cubes for a frat party punch bowl?

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